an in-depth look at Justin Bieber's "Baby"

i found a link on Twitter the other day. it was kind of cool.

actually, as someone who is incredibly disappointed that his life isn't a musical, i always think that sporadic and choreographed dance numbers are awesome.

of course, after i watched the video once... 14 times, i had that song stuck in my head so i checked out the real music video online and became one of 688,312,610 people to view this video (or one of 16. those pre-teen girls literally have nothing better to do than watch the YouTube).

as i watched the Biebs serenade some chick who isn't Selena Gomez in a bowling alley, i became to dissect the video. so for today's blog, we are going to break down the Baby video. this is like Sportscenter but for weirdos who have way too much time on their hands.

• :03 -lots of spinning. we are three seconds into this thing and i am already dizzy.
• :08 - the girl has at least eight people in her party. Bieber rolls at least seven deep. i don't know of a bowling alley that allows more than six bowlers to a lane.
• :24 - coolest bowling ball ever?
  
• :39 - i've seen enough Law and Order episodes to think that was probably an inappropriate move by the Biebs.
• :58 - wait, there are 10 girls in the main girl's party.
• 1:04 - more spinning.
• 1:20 - Drake bowls?
• 1:34 - reason #189 why it must be nice to be Justin Bieber. if i'm at a bar and i place my drink within 12 feet of the pool table, the bouncer will run over to give me a warning. this kid gets to roll around on these things without any consequences.
• 1:43 - bowling alley dance-off. who hasn't been involved in one of these things?
• 2:04 - it's clear that none of these kids are wearing bowling shoes.
• 2:10 - more spinning.
• 2:13 - does anybody remember when Ludacris had street cred?
  
• 2:43 - that is a clear lane violation.
• 2:58 - ahhh, look at Bieber go. get it Biebs.
  
• 3:16 - as someone who is from Atlanta, Ludacris should know that nothing good can come out of putting a white boy in a headlock.
• 3:21 - more spinning.
• 3:32 - Bieber sealed the deal in less than four minutes. impressive.
• 3:45 - the end.

so there you go. i hope that you learned something today.

The Saturdays, play us out.